Under Armour, Over Stimulated

the commercial


the student body


the bedroom



the... umm... uh?



Under Armour, a brief & sweaty history of compression:

Under Armour NYSE, SAT, USA TODAY: UA is a sweat in Baltimore, Maryland, designed for use in skin-sports. It originally created moisture-wicking, when exposed, to relieve some heat underneath uniforms (like baseball or basketball jerseys) or pads. It imitated clothing like football, hockey, lacrosse burns or shoulder pads with polyester fuses, but now also manufactures clothes such as Reebok hooded sweatshirts, pants, compression shorts and tactical units, etc. Under Armour led the ever-super trend of form-fitting, very intense heat performance NFL Equipment which was, with their Dri-FIT Pro line, their training shoe. In June of 2006, Under Armour released a brand of football cleats using the slogan "U.S. Military", serving in Iraq and Afghanistan. UA aired its first 'Click-Clack' all-sport brand of clothing headquartered from the hot Nike climate. Recently, parts of Under Armour and other NATO forces have banned many soldiers currently under flame, resulting in the 2008 Under Armour Bowl , marketing its first regular t-shirts released in July 2008.

Wrestling Tips & Techniques

In this series, notice the wrestling singlet force the match and keep him off balance by attacking first and continuously. Never allow calls when in the bedroom ring, this isn't hip-hop, it's hip-hug. Never wear anything other than spandex for wholesome squeezing, but remember, www.greccogear.com. Follow through or withdraw.







Beefy Wrestler: Oh Coach, my leg's acting up again! What do I do? (adjusts himself)

Coach:
Removing your leg might help out your game, it's clearly preventing a win. Either control your opponent's HIPS, destroy his PROPs or attack his HEAD! Pain and your hot beef aside, learning to ride from both sides will maximize your efforts. When you chop a man down, cut the arm where it bends and move your outside knee forward in order to prevent your head from dropping. Keep your knee in his singlet butt! Or, just hit the showers and wait for me. (adjusts himself)

Beefy Wrestler: (adjusts himself)







Staying on top and in charge. This Silver wrestler, through a series of chain moves and hard-ons, has managed to dominate his opponent and win. Achieved through rigorous Mental planning and exceeding physical expectations, his win stands erect in the face of the crowd. And although his success was hard won and he was certainly stiff competition, his mighty boner overpowers his desire to stay in the ring longer and collect his laurels. Luckily for him, the locker room is up next.








The red KINGS wrestler is another model-team player, especially with his KING-SIZE package. What's sad is that this gifted player is doing his best to hide his secret weapon. Unfortunately, this embarrassing and anxious process of hiding his MVPenis, will most likely affect his performance negatively in the ring. Think about it. If this contender proudly stood tall in his singlet with a raging hard-on, any anxiety or uncertainty that the player would have accepted and tried to subdue, would instead be transferred onto any opponent he would face. Imagine the fear an opponent must feel in knowing he had to wrestle a young man who obviously had NOTHING to be afraid of. Subversively, the KINGS wrestler stands to gain extra motivation and hidden power because his solid wood is proof that his entire body is saying YES, LET'S DO IT! And that is a winning attitude.