September 28, 2007

Wrestling Tips & Techniques

In this series, notice the wrestling singlet force the match and keep him off balance by attacking first and continuously. Never allow calls when in the bedroom ring, this isn't hip-hop, it's hip-hug. Never wear anything other than spandex for wholesome squeezing, but remember, Follow through or withdraw.

Beefy Wrestler: Oh Coach, my leg's acting up again! What do I do? (adjusts himself)

Removing your leg might help out your game, it's clearly preventing a win. Either control your opponent's HIPS, destroy his PROPs or attack his HEAD! Pain and your hot beef aside, learning to ride from both sides will maximize your efforts. When you chop a man down, cut the arm where it bends and move your outside knee forward in order to prevent your head from dropping. Keep your knee in his singlet butt! Or, just hit the showers and wait for me. (adjusts himself)

Beefy Wrestler: (adjusts himself)

Staying on top and in charge. This Silver wrestler, through a series of chain moves and hard-ons, has managed to dominate his opponent and win. Achieved through rigorous Mental planning and exceeding physical expectations, his win stands erect in the face of the crowd. And although his success was hard won and he was certainly stiff competition, his mighty boner overpowers his desire to stay in the ring longer and collect his laurels. Luckily for him, the locker room is up next.

The red KINGS wrestler is another model-team player, especially with his KING-SIZE package. What's sad is that this gifted player is doing his best to hide his secret weapon. Unfortunately, this embarrassing and anxious process of hiding his MVPenis, will most likely affect his performance negatively in the ring. Think about it. If this contender proudly stood tall in his singlet with a raging hard-on, any anxiety or uncertainty that the player would have accepted and tried to subdue, would instead be transferred onto any opponent he would face. Imagine the fear an opponent must feel in knowing he had to wrestle a young man who obviously had NOTHING to be afraid of. Subversively, the KINGS wrestler stands to gain extra motivation and hidden power because his solid wood is proof that his entire body is saying YES, LET'S DO IT! And that is a winning attitude.

September 20, 2007

All systems go, go, go, 3...2...1...

The wait is over. Launch prep was a long process, but worth the weight for weightlessness. I'm proud to announce the launch of my cosmonaut's newest cyberspace station:

September 12, 2007


"yo dawg, where u at? I'm sweatin mah ballz off here!"

(at a big hip hop party)
(holds phone up to the rapper)

"... its so expensive the processing, i want to see you before you leave, so much work we'll drink together...."

"Yeah I wrote that song yesterday, when this sun was goin down,
like so much stuff..." Fuck It makes me miss him, ya know....

"Yeh,.. I miss you too..."

"Fuck you both, dis is the SHIT, THA SHIT!!!!!!

STUNTIN!!! You See this?

September 11, 2007

NYC 9/11/007

This is the view from the fire escape on 9-11-007.
It reminds me of the Gotham distress signal for Batman. Maybe it's New York's own signal for a superhero that 6 years later, still hasn't come to Ground Zero. Although our American Memorial Hole for Heroes has an impressive presskit, and enormous promise, it's continual neglect makes me wonder about the 'war' that has distracted us.

September 6, 2007

Think Inside the Box

It's Fashion Time in the city, and last night Slava and I went to the CK 25 Year Anniversary Underwear Party. The invites were shiny pieces of sheet metal, complete with metal drinking straws. This clip comes from behind the Calvin Klein glass coffin of trapped beauties. With increased police presence in New York these tourist days, they managed to comply with a more stylish version of maximumodel security. Step aside Popemobile, the CKbox! I was still hoping that the box was really a tank for a group shower, or a life-size model snow globe complete with hydraulics, or the shields for a giant SUPERModel food fight using all the piles of food the catering couldn't distribute to the crowds of dieting fashionistas. But, they were giving away tasty bacon burgers and champagne.

Yonni Yonson from Wisconsin has this to say about Calvin Klein's Altered States

Turn This Into Something

Peter VS Robot
(i'm in this one if you can spot me)

This is an outtake "SEA WEED" for another of Gio music videos. It was back in February, snowing non-stop and we were shooting in crazy costumes, black balloons paint and face masks, on top of this funky hotel that served Jager-bombs before check-out. After the shoot, Gio and I threw our OTK party at BoysRoom with Guest DJ Bruce LaBruce. Gio's gonna be on the big screens yo, he plays "Rudolf" in LaBruce's upcoming zombie movie OTTO or Up With Dead People


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